Benrik diaries - Wolfs!

Instead of Oprah, my mother woke me up this morning saying:
"Well now I have to go to the hospital with dad, have you got the number
for some cab-company, you take cabs from time to time, right?"

Come again? Hospital? Dad?
God.. what time is it? (9:03)
I simply said "yes", trying to let it all sink in.

The fact is that my parents called me on my mobile yesternight, but when I
noticed I figured it was too late to call back.
"What's wrong with dad?" Worried, really worried. In my mind he'd had a stroke.
"Haven't got time to get into it, we need to go."
So I tried to come up with the number to a cab company.
Now, who in their sane mind remembers numbers to cab companies one minute after they've woken up to the news that something's wrong with their father?
But I really tried to remember since it was a matter of life and death..
Taxi Stockholm... something with 30,.. 30 30 00? 30 30 30? I said: "30 00
00." (Probably wrong.)
"Ok, I'll call you later when I'm at the hospital."
And then she hung up.

On my way to work I tried to remember if the last conversation I had with
my dad was a good one, and it was.
Then I thought that if something really, really bad had happened they would
have taken the ambulance wouldn't they? (At this point I had started
thinking constructively about it.) And my mom has a tendency to be a bit
dramatic when it comes to people being ill.
So to use a Swedish expression: I decided to have ice in my belly. ( = chill) At least until I knew more.
By lunch-time mother called me and explained that dad had a quite serious
infection in his leg, but they were on their way home now, he'll be fine.


Later a guy at work turned 60 and we celebrated with lots and lots of vodka.
No, we had cake.
Things are ok.

Benrik diaries - Out of sheer happiness and joy

This morning Oprah woke me up giving me guilty conscience before I had even started doing anything about anything.
Damn that woman!
Somehow I left the TV on and I will definetly be more careful about doing so in the future. Definetly be careful.


Yesterday I finally went to deliver christmas-gifts to my Godchildren (ho-ho-ho). I had bought 3 Donald Duck books for Robin and pink nail polish to go with the pink hairspray for Sara.

When you give people stuff you always want people to say something like: "Amazing, simply amazing, this is the best gift I've ever had... I ever will get... and I love you so much". And then you want them to jump around a bit, out of sheer happiness and joy.
Somehow they never say or do that.
They mumble "Thanks!"

I may be asking too much. : )


Am deeply disappointed in my own ability to tell lies. (not to mention my ability to be completly truthful)
But this time I had actually practised it all in my head:
"Well Santa came for some coffee the other day... you know me and him, we're like this..." *place for finger motion* "...he also dropped of a few things that he said he'd forgot to give you and asked if I could bring them instead."
I couldn't even get that lie over my lips, and people tell this one at random, at all times... well around christmas anyway.


Recommendation of the day is:
Selfish - Lonesome road

Benrik diaries - Make it to China

I do lie. But not pathologically and therefore I find this week to be very hard.
Last night I came to the conclusion that it’s either due to the fact that I have:
(a) a lack of imagination
or
(b) I’m a really good liar and my troubles are since this goes against the whole art of lying. Like when an architect makes a “simple” sand-castle (you know those round ones you used to make) or Maradona plays football for fun and doesn’t care the slightest about loosing.

But I will try, I will really, really try my best.

Otherwise the week has started of really slow.
I asked my boss for something more challenging to do since the regular things are running smooth as baby skin and I’m a bit bored.
He (Goran) gave me the map-thing we’ve been talking about so I’m gonna start making maps… (or at least learn how to.) Goran’s convincing me that it’s a really big thing and yes, I admit to being doubtful in the beginning but more and more I’m starting to feel like Magellan - about to go on a very long journey, discover stuff.
This goes very well with my plans for lunch.
We’re off to the china-place.

Benrik diaries - No 9

I’ve never bet one horses before. I bet on football (soccer) twice when I was about 11, but that’s 22 people and no horses are involved.
I didn’t have the slightest clue as to how things with horses-racing works so I simply told the woman behind the counter that I wanted to place a 1 money bet on a horse in some race and then she said that it wasn’t possible - the least amount of cash I could place was 2.
Fair enough…
I picked horse number 9 to win tomorrow, after all 9 is my favourite number and that’s unrational. What has number 9 ever done for me?

Benrik diaries - & my inner child wet her pants

This was a good day.
I didn't do any tasks, but at least I've got the book now so I've been planning my days ahead while helping a friend paint his hallway (red like in my kitchen)...
I really got to use my creative skills during both activities and I made a nice plan for tomorrow.

After that I went to celebrate Malins birthday. This was easily the funniest thing I've done all year. First we had soup and lots of wine at her place and then we went to a scabby old place in town to dance our pants off.
Scabby old places really are the best for dancing pants off.

These are the names of the people I remember from the party:
2 * Annika:s (they also the same second-name as myself which made the world smaller & people feel closer), Sofia, Malin, David, Anna, Per, Carola, Håkan, Pernilla, Stina, Jenny, Olof, Karl and… I guess I didn't speak to the rest of the people, paid attention or was drunk.
We danced some and Stina (whom I’ve never wet before) said that she thought I was a lesbian... Not that I mind, but she wasn't my type!
So anyway, I explained that I wasn't and that's when she kissed me on the cheek! Weird behaviour.
Karl and Olof were gay but not a couple. Everybody liked them very much and I'm having a ham-sandwich now.

Funny Vogue-incident at the dancefloor:
Earlier yesterday my friend asked me in English "What are you looking at?" (I was looking at something). I replied "vogue".
When the song came on (haven't heard it in years) my inner child actually wet her pants.

Oh... I've got a Benrik-partner, that was a nice surprise. : )
I wonder if he likes Keith Jarrett?
I know he likes "Fight club" so he seems like a man with good taste.

Benrik diaries - 112, what's the emergency?

I was waiting for the bus when a woman came up to me asking if I could give her 100 money since she had been robbed and needed it for a ticket home for her and her son (who I didn't see).
I said "no" since I didn't have any money.
She then went on and asked another woman standing beside me (she also said "no").
The my bus came and as I got on to it, through the window I saw a lady give the woman some money.
This made me angry and I decided to call the police.
Called the police, gave a report, description... They said that they would check it out.
I did this since I just thought that what she was doing was wrong. Going about trying to fool people with her story. Even though it's almost like other beggars asking for money for shelter or food. But it's also different... if her story was true she would have gone to the police herself wouldn't she? And then they would help her home. But she was acting on peoples good-will to sometimes help and be kind, and after that people feel like fools when they found out that they were instead cheaten, and then they don't trust strangers anymore.
I could have easily gone away thinking like most people that everyone's on their own. Like it is. hmm.... well.
I had decided that this would be "sowing the first seed of anarchy-day".
I had a plan.
Now I'm thinking that what I did was anarchy, in a different way.
I stumbled across my task-fullfillment.

Question of the day at work is: If you were a fruit what fruit would you be?
(feel free to answer)
I would be a pear. Not a mango.

Benrik diaries - It's not a science

My mind's way off today. Had a strange yesterday evening and now I'm trying to get back into things again. Bright sides and views.

I'm re-reading my favourite book right now. "Expedition L" by Erlend Loe. That cheers me up.

"We must incidentally, make clear from the beginning that if a thing is not a science it's not necessarily bad. For example love is not a science. So if something is said not to be a science, it doesn't mean that there’s something wrong with it; it just means that it's not a science."

That's a direct quote from the book when Erlend quotes Richard P Feynman.

I've been carrying around the H&M catalogue lately. Thought I’d take it to work and have a look inside when I didn't have much more to do. It came in handy this morning when I was waiting for my sandwich to get done.
I took a pen and started marking things I'd like to have. Just as when I was a kid and the catalogue with toys came (just before Christmas) I marked most things that had a touch of pink.
This time I got around to marking a red top. Not sure if I'm gonna order it tho', maybe I’m just one of those persons who likes to mark things.


My idea was to sexually harass myself all day.
It started off really good with me grabbing myself this morning. I said "Lilla stumpan" to myself and winked.
Strangely enough I kind of liked it.
I thought I was going to be more offended then that.
So I figure this mission has failed so far since I don't really feel harassed.
I'm trying to come up with something that's really gonna break me.

Meanwhile I've started a crime novel with an "H".
That went well.